Sunday, April 09, 2006
For this weekend, I was torn between two choices - chill with my schoolmates for two days and one night at Lundu, or stay back, and help take care of my granny.
My granny, who's walked the surface of the Earth for more than 70 years, went for an operation last Wednesday, removing part of her colon. Suspected to be cancerous, the results of her biopsy only came in yesterday, and it was confirmed that she was suffering from colon cancer and had to return for kemotherapy.
My granny's a fighter, I know she is. Not only does she suffer from high blood pressure and diabetes, one of her arteries (close to her heart) is slightly blocked by calcium and to the doctor's opinion, it is best that the calcium is removed.
I know no one can live forever, but if anything were to happen to my granny, I cannot accept the fact if she were to disappear suddenly. It would tear me to bits, because that would mean that I've taken her for granted, thinking that she would always be there.
In my childhood days I visited her often. She had one pet cat then, named Simba (which I stayed away from because for some reason I was allergic to short haired cats. The moment I got near one I'd start sneezing, my eyelids would swell and I'd develop rashes). She pampered this cat as not only does she comb it and bathe it often, she'd feed it (with a spoon, straight into its mouth) canned tuna mixed with rice. Now, she pampered more than 5 cats (I don't know how, but they all look so clean, so healthy...) My granny made the best local cakes I can remember - from the
kuih piring (shaped like the UFO) to
onde-onde (spherical green, starchy cakes filled with melted brownish sugar (
gula apong) coated in grated coconut. Her garden is one of the most beautiful and well-maintained gardens in Kuching, and the fruit trees she grew bore the sweetest and fleshiest fruits ever, which to my opinion, none of the fruits of the same kind obtainable in the market can compare with. Though my granny can be really fussy, I love her very much. The thought of losing her scares me a hell lot.
I don't visit her as often as I used to - in fact, I rarely do so these days. But I remember year after year, visiting her during
Hari Raya, she would break down and cry, saying how she wished our grandpa could have been there with her to watch all her grandchildren grow.
I know humans aren't immortal, and someday we will eventually have to let her go. But not now - not when she's still fighting for her own life. It made me realise that life is so precious - anyone thinking of taking their own lives should see that there are many others fighting to save theirs.
6:42 AM Azzie's got style
